Love Does Not Hurt

Today’s Gospel deals with issues and problems which surfaced in the early Church. Jesus had already ascended into Heaven, but the Church was still guided by his teachings and by the Holy Spirit. St. Matthew applies the teachings of Jesus to the situation where there is disagreement among the brethren. These disagreements can do damage to the unity and brotherhood of the faithful. The advice is clear: “If your brother does something wrong, go and have it out with him alone, between the two of you.” The gospel says that the offended party, not the offending one, should first seek reconciliation. It counsels personal intervention and honest confrontation. It encourages members of the Christian Community to sort out things privately, if at all possible. Christians are to deal with each other candidly and personally – no anonymous complaints – no anonymous letters – no anonymous gossip – no whisper campaigns. This is not the way Christ wants his followers to deal with each other. The purpose of confronting a brother or sister is not to humiliate them, but to be reconciled with them. Only honest confrontation can heal the wounds of hurt and division. If private efforts at reconciliation fail, then bring two others along to try to reconcile. If this does not work, then the matter needs to be brought to the attention of the whole community. The decision of the community will be made under the guidance of the Holy Spirit, and God will honor that decision. St. Paul reminds the early Christian Community to: “Love one another” with a love that does no evil. [Romans 12:10]

St. Paul reminds us that we must take responsibility for each other as members of a Christian Community. Belonging to a community means that we are involved in the life of the members. The Gospel gives us advice in our handling of wrongdoing and hurt. When we follow the Gospel and the advice of Saint Paul, we correct in a spirit of love, and love is the one thing that cannot hurt your neighbor.

You Know Me?

The following is a reflection on the damage done to each other, through gossip, whisper campaigns or anonymous letters:

“I have no respect for justice. I maim without killing.

I break hearts and ruin lives.

I am cunning and malicious and gather strength with age.

The more I am quoted, the more I am believed!

I flourish at every level of society.

My victims are helpless. They cannot protect themselves against me, for –

I have no face and no name…

To track me down is impossible. The harder you try, the more elusive I become.

I am nobody’s friend.

Once I tarnish a reputation, it is never the same.

I topple governments and wreck marriages.

I ruin careers, and cause sleepless nights, heartaches and grief.

I make innocent people cry into their pillow.

I make headlines and heartaches.

I am called Gossip!!

The next time you want to do something anonymously against another person – ask yourself: Is it true? Is it necessary? Is it kind? Do not harm –

Do unto others as you would encompass them do unto you.